In chichewa, the native language in Malawi, people great each other not with a simple "hello" but with different variations of the question, “How are you?”
Muli bwanji? = How are you?
Mwadzuka bwanji? = How did you wake up? (Good morning)
Mwaswera bwanji? = How has your day been? (Hello, again)
Mwadzuka bwanji? = How did you wake up? (Good morning)
Mwaswera bwanji? = How has your day been? (Hello, again)
In Malawi, creating connections with other people is more important than in any other place that I’ve lived. After spending the last two months living in New York City, this is a big change for me. Just a couple of weeks ago, I witnessed in the span of 30 minutes a screaming match between two men in a public library and a man literally run into a woman on the street without apologizing. Now, I walk five minutes from the guesthouse to UNC Project headquarters and could pass five Malawians that I’ve never met who will ask me how I’m doing.
Obviously, my experience here will always be clouded by the fact that I’m white. People will undoubtedly treat me at least a bit different than they would someone they know was born and raised here. I’ve witnessed the same trend between Malawians, however: be kind to others and respect them enough to ask how they are doing.
I can’t say that all Malawians are always nice. The police officers who motion for me to pull over just because I’m white to see if I’ll bribe them to let me go make me angry. The tailor at the market who took Savvy’s money and never produced what they had agreed upon does not deserve the utmost respect, in my opinion. On the whole, though, this is a special place full of more smiles per capita than most other places I’ve visited.
In addition to bringing back countless memories and many beautiful fabrics, I want to bring the muli bwanji mentality back to the United States. When I walk into one of the offices of the project I work for here, each individual person greets me with eye contact and asks how I’m doing. Each time, I can’t help but smile. In the United States, that could be seen as inefficient. Why spend so much time during the day talking to other people? That’s a “waste” of “time.” I’ve definitely caught myself analyzing the efficiency of this country – wondering how the average workday is longer than in the US, roughly 7:30am to 5:00pm in some places, but fewer things seem to get accomplished each day. In my first few weeks here in Lilongwe, I’ve commented a couple of times that everything is 50% hard than it would be in the United States – but that’s only true for me. This type of lifestyle is only a challenge for the planner, who, for the last four years, has planned out the homework she would do each day a week in advance. The woman who has apparently not spent nearly enough time asking others how they are doing.
But life isn’t about efficiency. Perhaps if we were robots we could reach 100% efficiency. We’re humans, though, and we want connection. We want to inquire about the lives of others.
One of my favorite quotes is from the movie, Harriet the Spy:
Obviously, my experience here will always be clouded by the fact that I’m white. People will undoubtedly treat me at least a bit different than they would someone they know was born and raised here. I’ve witnessed the same trend between Malawians, however: be kind to others and respect them enough to ask how they are doing.
I can’t say that all Malawians are always nice. The police officers who motion for me to pull over just because I’m white to see if I’ll bribe them to let me go make me angry. The tailor at the market who took Savvy’s money and never produced what they had agreed upon does not deserve the utmost respect, in my opinion. On the whole, though, this is a special place full of more smiles per capita than most other places I’ve visited.
In addition to bringing back countless memories and many beautiful fabrics, I want to bring the muli bwanji mentality back to the United States. When I walk into one of the offices of the project I work for here, each individual person greets me with eye contact and asks how I’m doing. Each time, I can’t help but smile. In the United States, that could be seen as inefficient. Why spend so much time during the day talking to other people? That’s a “waste” of “time.” I’ve definitely caught myself analyzing the efficiency of this country – wondering how the average workday is longer than in the US, roughly 7:30am to 5:00pm in some places, but fewer things seem to get accomplished each day. In my first few weeks here in Lilongwe, I’ve commented a couple of times that everything is 50% hard than it would be in the United States – but that’s only true for me. This type of lifestyle is only a challenge for the planner, who, for the last four years, has planned out the homework she would do each day a week in advance. The woman who has apparently not spent nearly enough time asking others how they are doing.
But life isn’t about efficiency. Perhaps if we were robots we could reach 100% efficiency. We’re humans, though, and we want connection. We want to inquire about the lives of others.
One of my favorite quotes is from the movie, Harriet the Spy:
“There are as many ways to live in this world as there are people
in this world, and each one deserves a closer look.”
in this world, and each one deserves a closer look.”
I even wrote the quote on a map I drew as a decoration for my bedroom.
I often think of this quote when someone asks me how I’m doing. Perhaps the closer look that each person deserves can start with a simple, “How are you?”